Loading ...Imagine this guy standing on a street corner and ringing a bell, wearing a sandwich board that says “The End is Coming!” 
Now imagine this little feller nailed to a cross, a reminder to all mankind of how much he suffered so that we may live in cable bliss. 
One of them will have to budge before the ball drops at Times Square this Friday.
If you’ve watched television in the last month or so (and I’m guessing you have, unless you’ve been locked in a closet at Texas Tech) you’ve heard of the spat between Time Warner Cable and Rupert Murdoch’s Fox. Time Warner says Fox is threatening to hold your favorite shows hostage for a hefty ransom, while Fox claims Time Warner is bullying the network and pocketing your money instead of paying for quality.
In other words, two very large companies are bickering over stacks of cash while trying to look like poor Tiny Tim. Both have websites pleading their cases and begging for your support. It’s like King Kong verses Darth Vader begging you to place your testicles in the palms of their hands.
If there is no deal and Fox goes ahead with its threats to pull the plug Friday, you will lose:
- Fuel
- Fox Reality Channel
- Speed Channel
- Fox Soccer Channel
- Fox Sports World Espanol
- FX
Notice that you will not lose the Sugar Bowl with UC verses Florida. You will not miss the last week of the NFL or the “always entertaining” Fox robot. The same goes for 24, The Simpsons and House. Unfortunately, American Idol is also safe. It would be a different story if we were in, say, Chicago or New York where Fox owns and operates the local affiliate channels. Then we’d be fucked.
Here’s the background on this shitstorm.
Reportedly, Fox wants Time Warner to pay the network $1 per subscriber every month. Cable channels like TNT and USA already get these fees—ESPN reportedly gets about $4 per subscriber per month. Over-the-air networks like CBS and Fox have done without, relying on commercials to pay their bills. But the advertising market has crumbled, no thanks to gadgets like your DVR which make commercials oh so skipable. So Fox has decided to start dishing out ultimatums for more money. The company is already on a roll finding new ways to bilk you, including plans to charge you to access its news sites while accusing Google of stealing.
Not that Time Warner has been the better public citizen. The company made about $660 million in the last quarter, yet it is still raising cable rates nationwide, including here in the ‘Nati. The cable industry as a whole has raised rates more than 30% since 1996, or about three times the rate of inflation. Time Warner has also courted ways of charging you more if you use the Internet too much (read: if you download too much porn). Swell!
Blah, blah, blah. The reason I bring this up is because I wonder whether you’d be willing to switch to an “a la carte” cable system instead. Try out this calculator for an idea of how much you’d pay. I’m right around $30 a month, which includes must-haves Lifetime and Oxygen. Mock me all you want. I love made-for-TV movies starring LeAnn Rimes.
For now, we wait and see what will happen as the deadline looms ever closer. At least it’s better drama than a lot of the shows Fox has churned out lately. And way better than the Fox Reality Channel.
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But Faux News is not affected? I’ll offer Time-Warner Cable the extra money not to carry that channel.
SCREW FOX- I could give two shits less about those channels and the greedy right wing bible thumpers at the Fox network.. and I HOPE TO gOD that they make people pay for their bullshit news.
Awww, but Rupert Murdoch is so cute! Oh. No. No he isn’t.
A la carte sounds great, but would be a disaster. A lot of the smaller channels that are really good (think your history channel, science channels, etc) wouldn’t get enough subscribers and would disappears. All that would be left would be the huge channels that appeal to the lowest common denominator (MTV, VH1, E!, USA, etc). I’m more than willing to keep things the way they are and skip over all the crap to make sure the boutique channels stick around.
You make a good point. If my cable options were whittled down to nothing but “The Hills” and “I Love the 80’s”, I’d probably do something rash like read a book. Yecch.