The Dump Festival is TCM’s weekly occasional linkdump of awesome stuff on the Internet. This was weekly, and then it wasn’t. Whatever; enjoy the weekend.
Some girl got stuck in the Pittsburgh airport for like 10 hours, so she made this video. Looks fun. I wonder whether she ran into this guy.
This Christian kid band is apparently now what’s known as an official “Internet Phenom.” You know, because they’re absolutely freaking terrible. If schadenfreude were an ice cream flavor, it’d be called Final Placement Chip.
Devo’s starting to do some hip-ass slick web marketing. It’s pretty meh, but I still love it because it’s Devo.
Here’s an essay from 1995 about why the Internet will fail. As you might guess, it’s wrong on pretty much every account. Also, if you’re not reading Three Word Chant, you need to get on the effing stick.
So, they’re doing a remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street with that ugly dude who played Kelly in the Bad News Bears (the original one where they drink beer). Here’s a trailer. Pedestrian.
Another pizza delivery guy was robbed. Thankfully, no one was killed. Robbing a pizza guy is really, really stupid, and I’m saying this as a former pizza guy. We drive lousy cars, we’re working at weird hours, and we probably have a trunk full of our band’s unsold CDs: do we look like we have a lot of money?
If you’re considering robbing a pizza guy, here are a few alternate ideas for you to think about:
Order a pizza and pay for it. Seriously. They’re like 10 bucks. Do you have 10 bucks? Do you have a buddy who has 10 bucks? Does your mom have 10 bucks? Ask around.
Don’t rob anyone. Did you know it’s a crime to beat people up, steal their money, and/or shoot them? I’m no lawyer, but I’m pretty sure those are all crimes.
Get a job as a pizza guy. If you don’t have money, and you really want a pizza, see if the pizza place is hiring. Believe it or not, they will give you money and pizza. Sweet!
The Original Dixieland Jass Band records the first ever jazz record, opening the door for John Coltrane to make your life good and for Kenny G to ruin it.
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, Bill Hicks died today in 1994 after a bout with pancreatic cancer. His work, strange as it might seem, has been a huge influence on me as a person. Had he survived, he’d still be doing it today, and there’s no telling how huge he would have become.
