Apparently there’s nothing to do, nowhere to go, not a thing to see or experience, and you can forget about trying to go anywhere, because if you do, you’ll just run into construction, obnoxious traffic, and probably someone you went to high school with, right?
Apparently the owner of Big Orange Marketing, a Cincinnati-based marketing firm specializing in social media marketing, Bridgette Raffenberg, thinks there’s plenty to do in the Queen City. She’s created a little project for her, her husband, and the entire rest of the city to take part in: 365 Things to Do in Cincinnati.
As a social media guru and Cincinnati native, she’s trying to get the city connected, engaged, and just, well, out. With every day, she posts another neat thing to do in the city, complete with pictures and info. For instance, Saturday, Cincinnati celebrated Earth Day (it’s on the 22nd), and she went to what looked to be a pretty awesome celebration at Sawyer Point, complete with beautiful weather, great music, good food, kids and small barnyard animals, crafts, informational booths, and also some information on social responsibility through the organization Share Some Sugar.
Check out her blog/FB/Twitter: there are great pictures, super-fun things to do (some of them even being free), and many of her Cincinnati excursions involve food and drink, and as a bovine mid-westerner, I can totally get behind that.
I would like to begin this week by thanking local record stores and all of their patrons who participated in “Record Store Day” this past Saturday. I know that stores like Phils Music and Memories in Cold Spring, and Shake-it Records in Northside both ran weekend-long specials, as well as sale prices on all merchandise in honor of the occasion. If you didn’t participate, then you need to take your IPod-obsessed ass down to one of these fine establishments, pay full price for a bunch of shit, and grovel for forgiveness from the Independent Record Store gods.
Some descent new releases this week starting off with the newest from Indie/Pop mainstays The Apples In Stereo withTravellers In Time And Space. Hip-Hop weed aficionados Cypress Hill are back with Rise Up. The newest Punk sweethearts Go Radio have a new one called Do Overs And Second Chances. Tricky, Math Rock trio Medications release Completely Removed. All hardcore Ska fans out (if there any left) will be all ears for the newest from The Slackers calledThe Great Rocksteady Swindle.
Busy week for shows kicking it off is the one man band known as Mike Silverman aka That 1 Guy with his “Magic Pipe”. You can check Mike and his weird smoke bellowing across between a bass guitar and a harp, Tuesday night at The Southgate House. Wednesday at Southgate is Tulsa’s Alternative, instrumental ensemble known asUnwed Sailor. Friday at the Madison Theater its’ the long-awaited return of Punk legends NOFX. Should be a good time if they shut the fuck up about politics for five seconds and go back to singing about beer bongs and shit. Saturday is my pick for show of the week at Southgate House. He’s may be one part vampire and one part hillbilly but he is all fucking Rock. Unknown Hinson looks like a cross between TheReverend Horton Heat and Eddie Munster but plays some serious kick ass country fried tunes. To add to his already impressive resume he does the voice of Early Cuyler on Cartoon Networks The Squidbillies. As if Rockabilly vampires aren’t scary enough for you. You can head to The Mad Hatter on Sunday and check out the most frightening Industrial band since Ministry, Ventana.
So that’s it lots to choose from this week so get your ass to a club or all of the clubs, and watch some fucking great, live, Rock and Roll. Rock on, kids!!
Each week, TCM asks its writers to discuss a particular subject. This week, we delve into the world of celebrity endorsements in order to uncover what we feel is the one that may unhinge the fragile latch on sanity that the world has.
Enjoy, or something.
David Ben
In general, I hate the idea of celebrity endorsements. I don’t really care what Derek Jeter has to say about anything at all. I mean, yes, the guy can play some damn good baseball, but I highly doubt that this man knows something more about a particular razor than I do. If he wanted to tell me about which baseball bat he uses and why, sure, I’ll listen. But razors? Nope.
That being said, if I ever get athlete’s foot, I’m obviously going to use Tinactin. Why? Madden. I have no idea whether he is has cause to know which product is better, but I mean come on. It’s John Freekin’ Madden selling aerosol foot spray.
Mike Hickerson
The craziest celebrity endorsements are those that get weirder in retrospect. Joe Namath in pantyhose (I wonder which brand Suzy Kolber wears), O. J. Simpson and Hertz (why was he running through that airport so fast?), and so on. I’m going to go with Carson Palmer’s John Morrell commercials. They’re already super bizarre, and there are any number of possibilities for them becoming even weirder as time goes by. If I were a betting man, I’d say that in 20 years, Palmer has good odds of being involved in some kind of incident that makes those John Morrell commercials seem like horrible SNL parodies.
Megan
Most ridiculous/offensive/wrongly sexy depiction of celebrity endorsement, hands down, is the one German ad agencies created for World AIDS Day, depicting, or shall I say, comparing, AIDS to despotic leader, Adolf Hitler. NSFW, b/t/w.
Not only does this ad connect sex with death (it’s unprotected sex that gets people in trouble, guys), but it also personifies a disease as the world’s most monstrous murderers, in a way likening those with AIDS to Hitler, Stalin, and Sadam Hussein. Gross.
In yet another ridiculous use of celebrity, a sperm bank in California is now offering sperm options for spunk-hungry ladies, based on the celebrity likeness of the donor.
James Garner certainly is viscous.
theworldofdale
As far as the most insane celebrity endorsement, I’m going with the posthumous implied endorsement of Viagra given by Elvis Presley. God rest his soul.
Jason McGlone
There is a completely batshit-crazy world of celebrity endorsements out there, and we’re barely scratching the surface. There have been some wild-ass endorsement deals where the ads have turned out to ruin our ideas of them, or at least have had the potential to, if only for the fact that they’ve been in other countries. Case in point: here, here, here, here, and everything Mr. T has ever done. Of all these, however, I’ve gotta go back in time a bit to a more creepy era, an era where shirtlessness was less sexy and more, well, uncomfortable, especially when one takes into consideration the act of literally BATHING in cologne. The craziest celebrity endorsement I’ve ever come across is hands down Charles Bronson for MANDOM, the Japanese cologne for men (who apparently like to shower themselves in cologne after a long night out, which flies in the face of all cologne logic, but whatever).
I like sports. Scratch that, I love sports. As Jerry Seinfeld said, give me people wearing shirts with stripes running around chasing something, and I’m going to watch it. But I have a few ideas on how to improve sports. It appears that the only requirement for being the commissioner of a major professional sport is be a total asswipe. If we can’t have change from the top, maybe we can have change from a distant, tangential, semi-anonymous voice.
So, Goodell, Stern, Selig, and Bettman: Listen up, here are some ideas for you to steal.
Fewer Teams: There are too many players. Too many teams. Please consider this- Oklahoma City has a professional basketball team. And the team plays in the NBA. And they are called the “Thunder.” Tampa Bay (coincidentally, called the “Lightning”) and Dallas (“Stars”) each have a National Hockey League team. There is team playing in the NFL for a placed called “Carolina” that I have not been able to find on a map. As for baseball: there are 30 major league clubs, each with a 40-man roster. Each team has between 6 and 9 minor league teams (yes, believe it or not, even the Pittsburgh Pirates have eight minor league teams- meaning that there are 8 teams worth of guys not good enough to play for the Pittsburgh Pirates). It is impossible that there are that many men in this country who deserve to make a living by playing games. Fewer teams, fewer players, better plays, better sports.
A stadium full of people watches two teams mill around what appears to be a buffet table.
More Brawls: I suppose this is one of the ways to get fewer players is to eliminate them via fights. We can tip our hats to the NHL who, in 2010, finally created a rule against blindside hits to the head. Considering that a fan sitting behind the goalposts was called for roughing Tom Brady, perhaps the rest of professional sports can step up their fighting game. Baseball players fight like girls (excluding Nolan Ryan). Personally, I think golf wouldn’t have to worry about whether Tiger played if they would allow some late hits in the bunker. Imagine Phil Mickelson getting tackled by Sergio Garcia! Never mind, those two would make the baseball players look butch.
Allow Gratuitous Celebrations: I can see Chad Ochocinco’s point. He got fined $20k for “bribing” the ref with a dollar bill, while Ray Lewis got fined $25k for nearly removing Chad’s head from his body (making his DWTS routines even more difficult). Not all celebrations are disrespectful and unsportsmanlike. It can be fun. Oh heavens, don’t let sports be fun. People might be willing to watch baseball if after hitting a home run, a player could run the bases backwards, or fist-pumping, or skipping (I’m thinking A-Rod on that one). If you’re good, you’re good. Enjoy it. If you’re not good, perhaps you should improve. I hear Mark McGwire has some ideas.
No press conferences: Because it’s just talking. Leave the talking to the guys with no athletic ability (the media).
Just a few simple implementations could drastically improve the sports landscape. Now all we have to do is remove all the ESPNs except plain old regular ESPN, we’re set. Oh, and get rid of Jim Rome. I hate that guy.
If Vengeance Be My Destiny is TCM’s Sunday comic. If you’re new to the strip, it’s the story of a killer robot ensuring the safety of a child, so that the world can be saved. It’s like Terminator with mishaps. To catch up on the story, go here.
It had to be maybe 8th Grade or Freshman year in high school when a guy from the neighborhood named Eric gave me a tape with The Specials on one side and The Toasters on the other. Not sure why, but I always preferred The Specials when it comes to second-wave ska; I suspect that I’m not alone in this in any way whatsoever, at least among those folks who actually like ska music (there aren’t many who’ll admit to it anymore, for the record).
So, without much further adieu, here go The Specials. Vids after the jump.
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