Offered without comment and possibly nsfw:
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Valentine’s Day is mercifully behind us. How did you spend it? Alone? If so, you are clearly an ugly and unlovable waste of space who is not worthy of a happy life. Or perhaps you have a soul mate who made you go see Valentine’s Day in theatres. Clearly, there are no winners on Valentine’s Day. And [...] There are two things in this world that say “love.” 1.) Heart-shaped anything. Clearly, a gift of precious stones means nothing if they are not set in the shape of a heart. You might as well give your love a diamond pentagram if you’re not going to give them a heart. 2.) Poetry, no matter how bad. But trying [...] According to Forbes, you have no excuse for being single. We are the 33rd best city in the country for singles based on our nightlife, singles scene, and, in the magazine’s words, “coolness.” Apparently we’re not as cool as Columbus, which ranked 21st, but we also finished better than Cleveland, which is all that really matters. That [...] Debating politics and religion is like jogging in place. You’re only going to get yourself all worked up without changing your view or anyone else’s. For that reason, the people who agree with Cincinnati’s COAST will agree with the way the group thinks mass transit is an incredible waste of money and possibly un-American. The people who [...] I’m not much of a car aficionado. I know a few basics. I know to get the oil changed now and then. I know about rotating the tires. I even learned how to fix my wiper fluid system after it froze solid. But I had to do some research to explain this oddity.
Jealous? [...] |
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